Finding My Fire

Long time, no blog… how are you lovelies?

When I was little, my answer to “what do you want to be when you grow up?” changed every day. Sometimes it was a ballerina, princess, teacher, mommy, I would even get wild and say doctor. As I got older and that question became more and more serious, I stuck with teacher because of my love for kids and bossing people around. In high school, they make us take career finding tests every year, where we answered a million questions on our likes and dislikes, and EVERY YEAR my top results was Bellhop. A freakin bellhop…. Like excuse wut? no. A little further down the list of results was daycare provider, teacher, and Public Relations consultant, but none of these stood out to me.

Most people know exactly what they want to be, what they want to study, or what they want to accomplish. I didn’t. I was (and still am) jealous of the people who FOR SURE know they want to be a doctor to save lives, or a lawyer to fight for what is right, or a singer to make millions. I have never felt that way. I have never felt a calling to those types of jobs. I do however feel called to fashion.

I have always thought fashion was just a hobby or something that you really enjoy, never anything you could make money out of. I mean, there are designers and models and such, but I’m not artistic, nor a size 2. I went into college as a business major (as basic as it gets), with a fashion minor, but was soon redirected by one of the fashion professors that I needed to switch that around: fashion major, business minor. So that’s what I did. It didn’t make dad too happy, but learning about colors, necklines, fashion shows, product devolvement, and more made me ecstatic.

Being home for the summer (and running out of money a month before school ended) made a job nessacary, and even though nanning made hella dollars, I needed retail experience to put on my resume for future internships. Through a family friend, and after getting over mono, I started my first big girl job at Banana Republic. And lemme tell you, I am in love.

Banana Republic is completely my style: trendy chic yet always classic and timeless (heck yea I just called myself timeless, self-love is in people). I have only worked two shifts, but I have never been so happy doing manual labor before. I found my calling, surrounded by customers, stripes, and fitting rooms.

I have always been a people person, but this takes it to the next level. I get to help people find clothes, style them, show people the newest trends, and see them happy as they exit the store with a bag in hand. I fold stacks of trousers (who knew there were so many different types), hang shirts, display jewelry, and dress mannequins. Everything I learned in the three fashion classes I took freshmen year come into play with this job. I get to learn about all the products and share my knowledge with customers while helping them find something that makes them feel good and happy and stylish. I also get to dress up (bonus!!!!). Ya’ll, I love my job.

Now I haven’t dealt with a screaming customer or worked the cash register or done black Friday, but I have no fear of those things…. I’m literally surrounded by clothes and people…I’ll be fine.

I guess why working at Banana makes me so happy is because it reassures me that I am doing and studying the right thing for me. That fashion is the correct path and I’m not headed into a dark hole of nothing. I feel secure in my major and excited for the future and what it holds.

My senior quote was “Be fearless in pursuit of what sets your soul on fire”. Now, it might not be medicine, or laws, or singing, or anything that guarantees a job with a good paycheck, but fashion sets my soul on fire. People set my soul on fire. Writing sets my soul on fire. The fact that I get genuinely excited to go to a retail job says a lot. But being there, folding clothes, helping customers walk out of the store feeling awesome about what’s in their bag, and knowing more and more about my products gives me endless amounts of joy. I love fashion. I want to be constantly surrounded by it, by new clothes, by runways, by people who are just as excited about it as me.
unnamednnnnnnnnnn (2)Being 19 is not easy, especially when you are expected to know exactly what you want to do in life. Being in high school and not knowing what you want to go to school for was intimating and really discouraging. Being 40 and hating your job and questioning how you even get there is terrifying. No matter your age, no matter if your dreams earn big bucks or not, no matter what your dad wants you to do, do what sets your soul on fire. Be so passionate about something that you crave to do it every day.

I hope that I am successful in the fashion industry. I hope that Banana Republic opens new doors for me. I hope that you find what your passionate about, what sets your soul on fire. I hope that fire never goes out for either of us.

All my love & more,


P.S. check out my other blog posts here


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